From a brown-haired teen to a graying older lady, I have seen the King in His beauty. The eyes of my heart have been enlightened. “Whom have I in heaven but You? And besides You, I desire nothing on earth.” His people are the majestic ones, in whom is all my delight.

Today I celebrate that day — now 50 years ago — when I knew it was time to give my heart and life to Him forever. I gathered a few friends who I knew followed Christ, and they prayed with me in a small college dormitory chapel, sitting in a circle on the floor. I said, “Lord, take over my life. I am making a mess of it.” No feelings followed for a couple of weeks. But then: joy and peace that have characterized me for almost all of these 50 years! Sin has troubled me. But He keeps teaching me how to deal with it and keep growing.

In this picture I painted a few years ago in a watercolor class, I tried to show my spiritual life: beset by evil that cannot succeed. All the while I keep growing toward light and freedom, and mercy drops keep falling on and around me.

I say with John Newton, 18th century slave trader who met Jesus and became a minister, abolitionist, hymn writer and author of “Amazing Grace”:

I am not what I ought to be! Ah! how imperfect and deficient! – I am not what I wish to be! I ‘abhor what is evil,’ and I would ‘cleave to what is good!’ – I am not what I hope to be! Soon, soon, I shall put off mortality: and with mortality all sin and imperfection! Yet, though I am not what I ought to be, nor what I wish to be, nor what I hope to be, I can truly say, I am not what I once was – a slave to sin and Satan; and I can heartily join with the Apostle, and acknowledge; By the grace of God, I am what I am!

To know Jesus is to know His tender care, His presence, His voice of love steering you to the actions you would have chosen to do if only you could have known their striking, beneficial impact to others.

“Oh the depth of the riches both of the wisdom and the knowledge of God! How unsearchable are Your judgments and unfathomable Your ways. For who has known the mind of the LORD or who became His counselor? Or who has first given to Him that it might be paid back to Him again? For from Him and through Him and to Him are all things. To Him be the glory forever!”

On this morning of my 50th spiritual birthday, I looked outside and my eyes suddenly focused on a beautiful orange double hibiscus flower, on a plant that hasn’t bloomed in a long time. (This plant was salvaged from some neighbors’ castoffs near the dumpster.) Recently, the branch holding the bud of this flower was nearly cut off by the plant trimmers going around our home. I was saddened and tried to tie the limb back together with twine, not really expecting the bud to be able to bloom.

But today, on this day I have looked forward to celebrating, I was presented with this majestic flower. I have no doubt it was from my heavenly Bridegroom.

It is like the single yellow trumpet flower that bloomed years ago, the first and only flower this plant had ever produced. I had planted the trumpet vine to try and cover an ugly shed in the garden of the house we were renting. The single flower bloomed on my physical birthday. In later months the vine went on to bloom profusely right over and through the grates of the garden wall (picture at top).

But that single flower? And today’s gorgeous blossom? I can’t see them as coincidences. Like the parting of the Red Sea that saved His chosen people. Or the coin Jesus told Peter he would find in the first fish he caught, to pay their temple taxes.

Jesus does things like that. So powerful. So personal.

He made me new, salvaging me and covering the ugliness of my sin, binding me where I was broken, causing His life to course through me, and though it looked impossible, helping me — even me — to bring His beauty into this world. By His grace, I am what I am!

So I say with the the prophet Hosea: “So, let us know, let us press on to know the Lord. His going forth is as certain as the dawn; And He will come to us like the spring rain, like the spring rain watering the earth.”

He will come to those who seek Him. It is certain. And He will cause our growth, gently, thoroughly, beautifully.

If you haven’t already, please come to Him. You will begin to know all that He is when you surrender all that you are, to Him.

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You’ll find a fuller version of my story of coming to faith in How My Song Began. If you haven’t yet come to know Jesus, don’t wait to investigate His love for you. Life is too short to live without Him. Why not enjoy His amazing love in this life and forever? Read About “The Nearness of God” or see everyperson.com for more information.